lived and loved.

2009-12-11T20:15:00.002+08:00

hit the gym alone.
wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. :)

i can't live without hot-toasted bread and milo nowadays.
haha.

that's basically my 3 meals :(

i think i will lunge 2 cans of milo to germany. haha.

but i think my carbo intake hit sky highhhhh.
fat.

2009-12-11T10:26:00.003+08:00

on what i thought today

now that it's over,
another episode has ended.

though everyone will move on with their lives eventually.
i'm not sure if i will move on, with such ease.

this year has been, a rocky one.
filled with DOWNs and not UPs...

had a lot of bad decisions which i'm still feeling very regrettable now.

nothing went right.

not in my relationships,
not mentally,
definitely not physically,
not friendships,
not financially,
not even in grades...

pathetic.
kinda glad this year is about to end.

but hey, i guess life is just like that, no wonder what day or date is it.
you just had to brace yourself up, and enjoy everyday.
time doesn't count, happiness does.

i don't know if lying to people makes you feel more secure, more loved and eventually happy.
i don't know if clubbing, drinking and taking drunkard photos takes away all the pain.
i don't know if working ever puts your mind off me, since that was your choice.
i don't know if we are still going to be friends, if it's not me who has been there/here for you all this while to help you with your work.

i don't, and i don't want to know.

i guess everyone has his/her life to lead despite all the sad/happy past.

yeah.
the word, past.
they said when it's over (oval), it's over.

why care about the other person,
when he/she doesn't for you?

i just had the old smses with me.
all the unhappy ones.
and the ones people sent to me just tell me to end it and find a better one.

and of course, happy ones.
but none by you.

oh well,
it's a bright and sunny friday.

i hope you have a good trip to shanghai-hong kong.
i hope you have a good working day in office.
i hope you were still lazing in bed. :)
and i hope you enjoy meeting up with people.

this year is about to end.
but i guess, life just kind re-started, for me :)

maybe next week will be a better one :)

1 week of slacking around with amanda/cinnamon.
yacht birthday party (cheryl's)
tennis with gary and clement tmr!
dental (so looking forward to it somehow.)
dvd marathons
exercising.

i am still thinking about sundown marathon.
HAHA.

so much for NO-MORE-MARATHONS.

revitalised, is the word. :)

2009-12-10T11:49:00.002+08:00

你說你愛了不該愛的人　你的心中滿是傷痕
你說你犯了不該犯的錯　心中滿是悔恨

你說你嚐盡了生活的苦　找不到可以相信的人
你說你感到萬分沮喪　甚至開始懷疑人生

早知道傷心總是難免的　你又何苦一往情深
因為愛情總是難捨難分　何必在意那一點點溫存
要知道傷心總是難免的　在每一個夢醒時分
有些事情你現在不必問　有些人你永遠不必等

_______________________________________________

they say, "you can never miss what you never had",
i had you, back then, then.

_______________________________________________

chiahwee. says:
你說你嚐盡了生活的苦　找不到可以相信的人
but dont you 開始懷疑人生 okay
ahaha

________________________________________________

planet 51 with brandon in 20mins time.

shit. i'm going to batheee

2009-12-10T01:13:00.000+08:00

fuck it.

because ITE.

2009-12-09T14:48:00.000+08:00

so you sailed away,
into a grey sky morning...........

2009-12-09T02:13:00.000+08:00

i love my brother.

period.

2009-12-08T17:11:00.001+08:00

today is emo day.

2009-12-08T11:44:00.002+08:00

all this time, we were waiting for each other.
all this time, i was waiting for you.
we got all these words , can't waste them on another.

2009-12-08T10:20:00.002+08:00

8th dec.

a part of me, is happy cause you are back today. finally.
but it's not as if we are going to meet everyday.

i don't know.

on a side note, i really love a subway now.

2009-12-08T10:04:00.000+08:00

"I made a mess of me,
I want to get back the rest of me.

I made a mess of me,
I want to spend the rest of my life alive."

- staind

2009-12-07T21:41:00.002+08:00

jaiminah; people have to fight for what they cherish. says:
chey
i v bored
heh

Yu 腾 Earnest cultivation yields fruitful harvests says:
aiya
msg congde la

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yu 腾 Earnest cultivation yields fruitful harvests says:
go find congde la
go go

jaiminah; people have to fight for what they cherish. says:
for what. he doesnt even bother finding me

Yu 腾 Earnest cultivation yields fruitful harvests says:
faster go
aiya
he nv find u
u find him la

_____________________________________________________________

It’s been a long time since 22,
I don’t remember you looking any better.
Then again I don’t remember you.

2009-12-07T19:05:00.001+08:00

" i dont wanna get over her,
i wanna get her back"

"you dont believe that a woman can enjoy being free and independenet?
i just don't feel comfortable being anyone's girlfriend.
i don't actually feel comfortable being anyone's anything, you know."

"i like being on my own.
relationships are messy and people's feelings get hurt.
who needs it?
we are young. we live in one of the most beautiful cities in the world.
why not just have fun and then save this serious stuff for later."

"what happens if you fall in love?"
"what does that word even mean? i've been in relationships and stuff but i dont think i ever seen it. there's no such thing as love, it's fantasies."
"i think you're wrong."
"okay, then what is it that i'm missing then?"
"i think you'll know it when you feel it."

- 500 days of summer

2009-12-07T00:53:00.000+08:00

everything is messed up straight from the start.

tell me,
what do you do,
when it all falls apart?

2009-12-06T16:48:00.002+08:00

i thought i could do that for you......

but apparently not.

things that supposed to be, but not, are not worth mentioning.
it's always the actions that counts, not the talks.

today is a sad day.

the abrasions hurt so much that when i bathed,
and water touches the abrasions (which looked like popped out meat; as if i've been canned) at the back and front,
i couldn't help but winch and kneel down, crying.

it hurts.
it hurts bad.

it was supposed to be for you.
but now...

2009-12-05T11:52:00.002+08:00

things to do (during the holidays)

sleep
finish my marathon
sleep more
sleep a lot
jog
swim a lot
gym (?)
cycle
get my calves heal (acupuncture time, i guess)
watch buzzerbeat
hang out with amanda
meet up with jessie
start doing some german
read up on germany and heidelberg
write a list to to-go places!
check out plane tickets!
sync my ipod
clean up my room
housekeep for a week for bing
watch many movies (avatar!)
watch a lot of DVDs
meet up with the db girls
start taking care of myself
save moneyyyyyy!
start doing the paperwork/admin stuff for germany
stop touching my hair (stupid habit is making me bald)
ubin with amanda
meet up with mpx people

(to be continued; i am going to sleep)

2009-12-05T09:14:00.002+08:00

did i disappoint you?
or left a bad taste in your mouth?

you act like you never need love.
and you want me to go without.

so here i am.
this is me.

i was sitting on A1, just thinking.
how is it that people should remain as friends,
so that,
just so that certain expectations don't fail.

so that, everyone will remain cautious and friendly and nice to each other.

meeting stef for new balance sale,
and lulu for gokusen.

2009-12-05T01:21:00.001+08:00

i am so drained now that i am feeling a bit depressed.
over...?

i dont know.

2009-12-04T08:46:00.001+08:00

Dennis Esterl
December 4 at 8:03am

i was online with my iphone only i think.... think you should just hop on the nxt flight to munich and just crash here, we'll find a way!

_________________________________________________________________

soon, soon, dennis. :)

2009-12-01T21:22:00.000+08:00

last paper tomorrow.
last dash. last hope for my A+ this semester.

gogo!

2009-11-30T10:00:00.000+08:00

stress.

tummyaches.
urgh.

my cognitive capacity is limited.
why do they want to make me memorise all that definition nonsense?

no sense.

2009-11-29T12:58:00.000+08:00

STUDY STUDY.

urgh.
i'm panicking. haha

2009-11-29T00:31:00.000+08:00

[Son of Victoria] jay. says:
you chose your life.
be less suicidal, and be more appreciative.

____________________________________

sounds like a grown-up man, didi!

2009-11-28T20:51:00.003+08:00

it is ironic.

i struggled when making decisions,
decisions, however might seem irrational to many,
have been thought throughly.
(you know balancing the pros and cons.)

only to end up,
regretting.

so much for not looking back.
so much for not regretting.

FML.

2009-11-28T20:12:00.003+08:00

studying complements sleeping very well.
i have been taking 3 hour naps everyday.

time is running out.
so is my patience.

i can't wait for exams to be over.
but on a side note, there isn't anything much to look forward to after the exams.

studying makes me depressed,
i need my exercises to keep my sanity but my calves won't allow me to.

so i get emo. :(

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Slip inside the eye of your mind
Don't you know you might find
A better place to play
You said that you'd never been
But all the things that you've seen
Will slowly fade away

So I'll start a revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside. Summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

So Sally can wait, she knows its too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I heard you say

Take me to the place where you go
Where nobody knows if it's night or day
Please don't put your life in the hands
Of a Rock n Roll band
Who'll throw it all away

Gonna start a revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
Cos you ain't ever gonna burn my heart out
________________________________________________

urgh.

2009-11-28T00:55:00.002+08:00

i am so tired.
but i spent 90% of my waking time:

1. playing bejewelled on fb
2. playing hexic and minesweeper with horrid tan
3. playing rock band with the family
4. feeling very drowsy + hungry + hot

and now i'm feeling very sleepy already. and it's already 1am :(

but anyway,
i was reflecting on the car on my way home from sis' place.

which makes me understand your importance, because you:

1. are my everyday
2. make sure i eat properly (no matter i am a porkchop or not)
3. ask me to do stretching cause my legs suck
4. kickstart/end my day
5. listen to my rants
6. understands me and my HUGE ego
7. influence how i speak (no more DIE DIE DIE)
8. care enough to ask me to not go jog at night
9. makes me laugh/smile
10. taught me a lot, along the way

so... i guess and i hope you know how important you are,
to me, at least.

and thanks for just... being like that.